When someone you care about is going through a difficult time, you might not be sure what to say. Sometimes, you might not say anything at all because you don’t want to say the wrong thing. Other times, you might only say what won’t “tread on their toes”. In either case, people can actually miss the mark of what the person truly needs to hear. Here’s an example we encounter at Align:
Say a young woman experiencing an unintended pregnancy comes to us for help, and her boyfriend, or best friend, or her parents are with her. The girl is scared and doesn’t know what to do about the pregnancy. And the person with her says this: “I’ll support whatever you decide.” That actually might not feel supportive to her at all, because what she might hear is: “This is YOUR problem. YOU have to figure it out.” Instead, it could be more helpful for us as Christians, when we find ourselves in these delicate situations, to share our truthful, biblically-based thoughts and opinions with the person in crisis, and step into the difficult situation with them. For example, say, “We’ll figure this out together.” Instead of “Whatever you decide.”
We recently met with a couple where the girl thought her boyfriend wanted her to have an abortion. But when he turned to her and said, “I really want us to have this child. I want to be a good father to this baby,” you could see the relief just wash over her face! She immediately agreed, and they chose to parent their child.
Zechariah 8:16 says, “These are the things that you shall do: Speak the truth to one another; render in your gates judgments that are true and make for peace.” Lord, help us have the desire and the courage to support one another by speaking truth in love. We have all been Created for Him.